i must be dreaming // REBEKAH

[wesley]

Wesley was not an artist. He could not draw, he could not paint, he could not...sculpt. Hell, he could barely even write. Well, obviously he could write...Wesley's writing was just insanely messy and barely legible. But still, he liked art galleries for some strange reason, and during the month and a half he had lived in Portland, he had been to the art gallary probably three times. Maybe four. But he had never gone with Rebekah, and he assumed she would like it. She seemed...artsy. And, well, he wanted to go out on a date with her, but it wasn't like they could go out to eat or anything. Since she...didn't eat. Which Wesley hated. She was too skinny. Not as skinny as when he first met her...but still, she was skinny. And Wesley didn't want her to die or anything. Or get sick enough to be put in a hospital. They had been only dating what, three weeks? But he really liked her. And she had said she wanted to have sex...which was big. Mainly because she was a virgin, and Wesley wasn't. A lot of people were surprised to learn Wesley was a virgin. Hell, he himself was kind of surprised that he had managed to keep a girlfriend long enough while in high school and had sex with her. But yes, from the beginning of his junior year, to near the end of his senior year, he had had one girlfriend. She had been pretty, and nice, and they had slept together at the beginning of their senior year, and continued to have sex a few more times until they broke up after prom. Not a very dramatic breakup though. It was just that she was going to go to university in Florida, and he already had plans to move to Portland and take a year off. Why he had chosen Portland, Wesley still didn't know. It had seemed like a good idea, and obviously it had been...since he met Rebekah and now, well now they were dating and possibly going to be having sex in the near future.

Wesley couldn't help but think that maybe...just maybe...she only wanted to have sex because she thought he was losing interest or something. He was pretty sure she was jealous of Delilah, which was insane, considering Wesley and Delilah only talked on the internet, and had made a pact never to meet since that would just be...weird. Even though they lived near each other, it would be weird. And Rebekah was the one Wesley liked, and would probably eventually love, if they continued dating, which he hoped they would. They had fun together, even though she was kind of shy sometimes. And didn't really talk about her family...which was kind of odd, but Wesley shrugged it off. He knew lots of people disliked talking about their families, and Rebekah was obviously one of them. Wesley couldn't help but wonder though, why she came to school here. He knew she was from Boston, she had told him that much. So why had she come to school all the way across the country? Come to think of it...Wesley didn't even know where she went to school...which was weird. Maybe he should ask her. Even though last time he had asked her some questions, she had gotten a bit...annoyed with him, even though she had acted like she hadn't been. Oh well. Wesley wouldn't bug her about her family, or where she actually went to school. They were allowed secrets, especially because they had only been dating for three weeks...known each other for only a month or so. He didn't want to screw anything up.

Wesley looked down at Rebekah as they walked through the art gallery. They had been there for probably only half an hour...but it didn't seem like she was having that much fun. Maybe she thought he was boring. That was probably it, wasn't it? Wesley didn't want to be thought of as boring...since he didn't think he himself was boring. Yes, he was awkward, yes, he acted child like...but was he boring? No, not really. At least, he didn't think so. "So are you having fun?" Wesley asked Rebekah, swinging their hands which were laced together as they walked. They were currently in the photography section, which was Wesley's favourite. And not many people around, which could come in handy if they wanted to...make out. Just kidding. Kind of. But Wesley couldn't see Rebekah wanting to make out in a public place, especially a public place where there were cameras. But he was a teenage guy, he had a pretty girlfriend...he was aloud to think those things, was he not? And just because he was thinking them, didn't mean he would actually go through with them. He just had an overactive imagination.

STATUS!? done
WORD COUNT!? 846
TAGS!? rebekah
OUTFIT!? here
NOTES!? hi this post sucks but i have to go study
CREDIT!? you

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[rebekah]

It was times like these that Rebekah started second thinking the whole keeping-her-entire-life-a-secret-from-Wesley plan she’d brilliantly, or not-so brilliantly come up with pretty much the second she met him. Ever since the moment she’d met him she worked hard on not talking about anything, not her past, not her family, not even about the school she was going to. Besides, being mysterious was sexy, wasn’t it? And she was pretty sure if he knew how fucked up she was, really, he wouldn’t like her anymore. And of course because of this she’d had to leave out the details about art…which was kind of a sensitive subject to her. She’d been quite the artist when she was younger, actually up until her mother got married and her eating disorder was…picked up, if you will, since everyone made it sound like it was just a bad habit anyway. She’d been into everything, really. Painting, sketching, sculpting, she’d even done origami for a short amount of time. And photography. Chances were if you named it, she did it, or was willing to…but then for some reason she just couldn’t anymore. She’d sit there for hours just trying to do a simple sketch and nothing would come out when she pressed the pencil to the paper. And since then…art was kind of a sensitive subject. She dropped all of her art classes, and wasn’t taking any now. And whenever she saw someone so much as doodling she felt bitter…but of course her boyfriend didn’t know this. He probably didn’t even know that she was a former artist, and that all of this made her incredibly…sad. Nostalgic. Take your pick. And of course she couldn’t be mad at him or anything…it was her fault, really.

Still, she also couldn’t help but be sad as they walked through, even as their hands were clasped together. And she tired to look happy…she just failed, except for a few attempted smiles. She couldn’t help but look around at everything and think about the fact that she used to be able to do this. To be able to make something out of nothing, like these people did, make something that people actually liked to look at. Her mother had always said art was dying, and that it was the job of artists, like herself, to keep it alive…but now she couldn’t even do that. She hadn’t so much as picked up a paint brush in…well, let’s just say in a long time and leave it at that. She hadn’t even attempted to since moving here, she hadn’t even brought her art supplies…but this place made her want to. The only bad part was that she knew she couldn’t…what would she draw? Before she’d never even needed to think about what to make, it just happened…now, her mind had some kind of block. And she wanted to tell her boyfriend about it…really. He was a great guy, she liked him a lot, maybe she’d grow to love him…but she didn’t need to burden him with her insignificant problems. He had problems of his own…like his parents wanting him to move back. Was it selfish of her to not want him to, just because she’d be alone? Yes, probably.

She cringed a bit at the question, snapping back into reality…was she having fun? No. No she was not. She was feeling like shit…she wanted to go back to her dorm and call her mother, and ask her to mail her art supplies down. But instead of saying as much she just smiled her usual far-off smile and shrugged her thing shoulders, squeezing his hand. “Sure. It’s great.” She replied, not sounding all that enthusiastic…which really, wasn’t all that abnormal. She didn’t usually seem that enthusiastic about most things. But back in the day…she would have been about this. She’d come out of her shell and be the overly bright person that only a precious few saw, and babble about the meanings of the painting, and drag him around the place…which was only proof of how much she’d changed. Which made her sad, really. But she managed to force herself to look slightly interested as her eyes were drawn to a painting…it was pretty. And slightly resembled something she would have done, back in the day, which made the corner of her lips turn down a bit, and a sigh escape her mouth. But instead of saying anything on the matter she just walked a little closer to her boyfriend, squeezing his hand once more…because dates with him, even ones that were like a form of torture, were better than going back to her school full of insane people. And she felt bad…because she was pretty sure she was going to make him feel bad if she didn’t at least seem like she was having a good time. So she made her smile look slightly less dull and kissed him on the cheek lightly, looking around the place once more, despite the fact that she still felt a tinge of sadness. “It’s all…pretty.” Not usually an adjective she’d use for art…but things had obviously changed.

STATUS ~ finished
WORDS ~ 853
TAGS ~ wesley da qt
OUTFIT ~ click
LYRICS ~ marla singer doesn't take standerdized tests - analog rebellion
NOTES ~ fail post is fail
CREDITS ~ me

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